A Female Guide to Online Dating (For Men)

By Kendra Clark

Whether you use Tinder in the hopes of a serious relationship or just a casual hookup, this article could seriously increase your chance of matches on this app. As a woman, I can tell you that we judge a profile within a matter of seconds and the smallest things such as one photo or one grammar mistake is enough to swipe left. Creating the right Tinder profile can be a daunting challenge, but it can also be fun and it’s a good idea to do it with friends. This article will be giving you some tips on how to get more right swipes and telling you what details women look for in your profile.

Show one of your hobbies

This first tip is something women who are looking for something more serious than a casual hookup will adore. We like seeing that you have hobbies and what you’re interested in, it’s also a perfect conversation starter. For example, sporty photos such as football, swimming and rugby go down a treat for women as we get to see you in action doing what you enjoy. Expressive art such as painting, acting and music is also something we look for as it shows that there’s more to you than just a pretty face. Something you can do together if you were to become a couple is even better. Think more dog walking over Warhammer.

Don’t post selfies

If you’re like me and never manage to get photos whenever you’re out doing things, not posting selfies can be a difficult challenge. The truth is though, most of the women I know don’t really tend to find men’s selfies attractive which can lead to a left swipe. Selfies also almost always have bad lighting and quality, so try to use photos from your nights out or posey photos with awards. One of the best photos you could use is a family photo as we find them adorable, leading to an instant swipe right. Especially if it's with a younger sibling or a grandparent.

Do include a bio

No matter how attractive your photos are, in my experience boys without a bio don’t usually get a swipe right. If you don’t have a bio, it makes you seem like you have nothing much to say and aren’t really bothered if you get matches or not. Bios can be hard to think of but even a cheesy pick-up line from google is better than nothing. Avoid lists at all costs, especially if it’s listing what you want in a partner as it can make you seem like you’ve spent too much time on your profile and are trying too hard plus it’s just not natural. Bios should be short, funny and catchy, a good thing to include in your bio is a link to your Instagram profile if you have one.

Don’t have all group photos

Simply because no one has enough time to swipe back and forth through your profile trying to find out who you are. One or two group photos is good as it shows you have a social life, but if you don’t have at least two singular photos, chances are you’ll get fewer matches.

Do check your grammar!

This is one of the simplest but most important things when it comes to bios or the first message you send to a new match as not having basic grammar skills is one of the biggest turn-offs for a lot of women. For example, if I see that at the age of 18+ you still don’t know the difference between your and you’re, it’s a no from me. This doesn't matter so much once you’ve started speaking but first impressions do count so for your sake if you’re unsure, use a spell and or grammar checker.

Don’t use old photos, even if you look good in them

Photos from a year or two ago are okay, but we really want to see who you are right now and not dated photos. Women like to see how you present yourself and what kind of style you have. However, photos from a big and important memory of your life such as your graduation or travelling photos are attractive as it shows you enjoy making meaningful memories. If the past couple of months of Budweiser and burgers has been unkind then it should be safe to use a more flattering photo (so long as it is representative).

Choose an anthem

Anthems are something you can choose from your most listened to songs on Spotify and an amazing conversation starter. Even if you don’t have the best photos or most exciting bio, if you have the same music taste as us, we’ll probably swipe right. Music taste is important and if someone has the same taste as you, it’s an easy conversation starter and something that you already have in common. A good guide for selecting an anthem is to select something you genuinely like but not something that screams “I take myself too seriously”. When in doubt stick to Bon Jovi.

Don’t open with “Hey”

On Tinder, you’ve got to remember that there is competition and a huge selection of guys to choose from. What you don’t want is your message to get lost in the pile of other boring messages that are identical to each other. If you can’t think of what to begin with, opening with a compliment is almost always gonna go well, but if you’re more of a funny flirtatious guy, a cheesy pick-up line can go a long way as it shows your personality a bit more. Try to link your message to their profile, for example, if she has a pet photo, mention how cute her pet is, most people love talking about their pets so this is likely to work or if she has a Halloween dress-up photo, find a pick-up line involving her costume (do make sure that it is a costume first).

Do be picky!

It’s important to remember that not everyone can be for you, and you can’t be everyone’s type so don’t be disheartened by anyone who doesn’t swipe right on you. Whether you find them through Tinder or not, there’s always going to be someone out there for you. So stick at it!